Clone Wars - mini-review

What a disappointment this film was. My seven year old begged me to take him to this movie, so we went last night. Ugh. I had not read full reviews, but knew that the guys at Ain't It Cool hated it. I didn't hate it in quite the same way, but just was saddened by it. There are reasons, folks, that this film has only a 5% rating for Top Critics on Rotten Tomatoes.

I didn't hate the look of the film, but considering how every other recent good animated film has made me gasp in amazement -- this film had nothing special about it at all. It was basically three episodes of the Cartoon Network show due out shortly strung together. For my son, that was fine, and he was a happy camper. Me, not so much.

There is nothing to care about in this movie. The plot is insipid. It is just non-stop battle scenes that go on and on and on. The new girl character that becomes Anakin's apprentice is so annoying. Let's just say I wasn't surprised to learn she's been on the That's So Raven show. I get that they're trying to appeal to girls, but the dialogue was so trite and stilted. I kept thinking about the classic lines, witty banter and relationships in the first two Star Wars films. We are a long slippery slope down from those days, let me tell you. There is a character in this film that is a relative of Jabba. Imagine a Hut in drag with makeup with a Truman Capote accent. Yes, really.

Don't waste your money. Not even worth a rental, unless you're renting it for your kids to watch in the back of the car where you can't see it. One and a half stars. The writers of this film don't even deserve to be writing for Cartoon Network. I've seen much better there.